As a parent it has become near impossible to keep your child from viewing or reading today’s news, and having chat sessions with their piers about the details. We all know that what your child’s friends say will carry a tremendous amount of weight as to how he/she will view the world, and react to their favorite celebrities go or bad. I believe this is all very solid evidence that allowing celebrates to have to much input into our children's lives will back-fire. As a parent or grand parent we should be auditing what our kids think at the same pace the media is supplying them with every sorted detail of the most resent indiscretions of any number of celebs.
It is some sort of insane parenting that thinks we can lie when we need to, drink excessively because of stress or under the disguise of “letting off a little steam, we're just enjoying our friends" or express no opinion, (or even worse a condoning one) when a politician, minister, ball player, actor, neighbor, or relative does something that is just WRONG. . . . . are we of the thinking our kids are deaf, dumb, and blind??
I just shake my head at the parent that will chat on the phone with their best friend about the current celeb phupa, laughing and joking about it while their child is sitting in the next room, or in the back seat of the SUV listening and forming their own accepting or condoning opinion based on their parent’s conversation. Ask that parent if they think their Johnny or Sally was listening and everytime they will say "NO". . . . perfect example of insane parenting in action.
The Teachable Moments;
You’re taking your kids to school driving along and the radio updates Tiger Woods affair with still yet another women coming forward. You’ve talked about this a few days ago with your kids, and told them how upset, ashamed of, and mad you are at Tiger for what he has done, the bad example he has set. You’ve said it was wrong and will be turning off any commercial he is in. Listen Carefully – that was then this is now, repeat your words every time the media repeats theirs do so until your kids yell "OK, OK we get it please stop talking about this, our ears are bleeding and throbbing. We understand he was wrong!!!!"
Why do people have bumper stickers that say “If you’re not outraged about the war in Afghanistan and Iraq than you must not be paying attention” but have no opinion or outrage about the lousy morals right here in their country that are polluting our kids. And, mind you this pollution isn’t happening every once in a while, it’s happening every time the media updates the news, and it’s posted to your child’s RSS feed on their computer or phone.
Daily . . . we need to be the living examples of what we want our children to become.
Your child should have YOU and their GRANDPARENTS as their heroes, as the people they look up to, as the kind of person they want to become. No matter what occupation they choice to pursue, or whom ever they decide to marry your values should guide them through life. When your kids need to make the right choice it should be a no-brainer for them because you guiding principals are firmly planted in their mind.
Be able to look your kids in the eye and say, "that’s wrong, don’t do it", and be able to back it up with your past action. Be able to say "I didn’t do that", and if you did do it in the past, be able to say "I learned how wrong it was and don’t do it anymore. I was wrong to think that way".
Live the kind of life . . . right now . . . that you would want your child to live when you’re gone.
Not sure what’s right or wrong, not sure of what is an OK principal or value to pass along to your kids?? Maybe you never got any guiding principals as a child growing up, everything you learned was by trial and error, and fortunately you turned out OK. Cool – now ask yourself “do you want your kids to go through that kind of Hell”
Not sure what your values are or what your guiding principals should be?
Here is a simple way to get started;
Write the eulogy you would want your children to be able to say at your funeral, without stretching the true, or leaving things out, no bullshit, no lies or embellishments, just the simple truth of who you were and what you stood for when you were alive. Make those words into your guiding principals, and use them every time you need to update your kids.
Stay Health and Strong
